You Are What You (Hopefully) Choke On

So where do the elite circles in Beijing like to masticate? A jerk joint, you say? No, silly, those are Jamaican, but that was an excellent guess. Truth is, after a hard day of suppressing Tibetans, tainting dog food, and supervising prison production quotas of toxic toys, the savviest Chinese overlords repair to a big dick restaurant. No, really.

An erudite explication of the finer points of Chinese large-penis cuisine may be taken in here.

A tip of the Sardonic Glans-o'-Shanter to the JAH-mon for alerting me to this gristly tidbit.

Finally, A Solution To Underconfigured Ribbons

I walked past this book the other day at the Strand. New York's mightiest bookstore specializes in used books, but also has a selection of the more important new titles, such as this 696-page tome on customizing the ribbon in Microsoft Office. I was actually looking for that new three-volume set on Using Folders in Windows, but it must be back-ordered.

Death-Metal Dog

OK, it's only funny for twenty seconds, but ten of those seconds are really funny.